Pleasetube that Viewtube that Youtube so well

by sethifus



Here's some of my songs from youtube!


released April 13, 2014

All songs recorded by me with my iphone.



all rights reserved


sethifus Indianapolis, Indiana

I love to write songs, be silly, and entertain.

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Track Name: A Car Song
She is only part machine
the rest of her is 100% female.
With her coffee scented seats
and stained interior
instead of d-d-detailed!

She only has one speaker blown
but you can't hear the others over the engine.
She handles fine, but starts of slow.
Zero to 50 in just under 5 minutes.

She get's me where I need to go.
My Geo Metro.

She's a welded work of art
if abstract sculpture just happens to be
your thing.
She fits snugly,like a glove.
A claustrophobic nightmare
agoraphobic wet dream.

Best little car I've ever had
well, that's not true
technically she's my dad's.

She gets me where I need to go.
My Geo Metro.
Track Name: A Love Letter to Junk Foods Past
I miss
Mr. Phipps Pretzel Chips
Hi-C's Ecto Cooler
Showbiz Pizza
Doritos Taco Bell's Taco Supreme Chips
S'mores Crunch Cereal
and I never got to try Slurm.

... Hidden Treasures Cereal was pretty good, too.
Track Name: She's Loud!
Well my little girls' gotta
healthy set of lungs
even if she's whispering
your ear's'll still get stung

She's loud! She's loud!
Well my baby's loud
and she proves it to me every day!

My baby's not a whiner
no she almost never pouts
not to contradict the Beatles
she don't need to twist to shout!

She's loud! She's loud!
Well my baby's loud
you can hear her from 3 miles away!


My honey is affectionate
she loves to kiss and hug
but whenever I get close to her
I have to wear ear plugs!

She's loud! She's loud!
Well my baby's loud
and I like-a my baby that way!
Track Name: Cease and DePinterest
I've got a request
I hope it won't make you mad.
You see, there's something you're doing
that's making me sad.
I like what you're sharing
your tastes are spot-on,
but I've gotta admit
there's something you're doing wrong.

For me your social networking
don't work.
I'm either left nauseated
or feeling unsated
eating Taco Bell Take-out
like a jerk.
Track Name: And They Lived...
"The End" happened long ago
but we kept on going
even after our tale was spun.
Nobody wants to read the epilogue
it's "P.S. Boring", but for us
the Love Story has just begun.

So maybe my looks have dashed
and I many no longer be Charming
and you're a dame who's still frequently Distressed.
We can take comfort in
attention shifting to younger heroes and
we can finally rest.
Happy in our Ever After.
Track Name: Workstudy (9:45)
9:45, 9:45
What can I do
with a 9:45
I got here at 9
I'm not done 'til 5
my day's just begun
don't think I'll survive.
'Cuz looking at the clock 10 million
times won't make the day go faster.
I'm waiting for my life to catch up with me.

Girl with a whim, girl with a whim,
what can I do with a
girl with a whim?
Give her some space
let her taste the wind
If I let her roam
she'll come back again.
She needs to make her own mistakes
and I know I'll just be in her way.
I'm waiting for my girl
to come back to me.

Baby of mine, baby of mine
what can I do with this
baby of mine?
Show her true love
teacher her to thrive
if I offer her help
she'll be just fine.
There's only so much I can teach her
until she's out there on her own.
I'll show her what I know
and hope she won't forget.
Track Name: It's About Time
Time needs to move
a little more quickly.
Time's taking far
too long.
Time takes its time
all too often
any time that
you are gone.

When you're not here
I fear
that we'll be
apart forever.
When you appear
my dear
and we're back
I wish it could
last for all.


When you'e around
I've found
each rendezvous
and happy meeting
goes past
so fast
our time is fleeting
but it's only a matter of...

Any time that you are gone.
Track Name: Abominable
She's a 'squatch you need to watch out for!
I don't think you're ready for this Yeti, no.
She's got big feet, if you should chance to meet her,
no pictures please.
She's a missing link, I think
that's how she likes it.
Track Name: Corn Palace
Under the watchful eye
of the statue of Cornelius
the Palace stands eternal
above each wave of tourists.
Inside and amalgam
of museum, gym, and theatre.
Outside a gallery
and the world's largest birdfeeder.

The Mighty Palace of Corn!
Not constructed of it but adorned.
So raise your chalise!
Let's have three ears for the Palace!
Ear! Ear! Ear!

It's not a tourist trap
but a towering, shining beacon!
A testament to harvest success
erected (ear-rected) each tourist season!
A wonder of the midwest
not found in Minnesota
with domes straight out of the
Taj Mahal in Mitchell, South Dakota!


It may seem cob-bled together
but that's just CORNjecture.
Attend this KERNEL of knowledge
it's a marvel of EARchitecture!

chorus x2
Track Name: Row, Row, Row Your Bot
Row, row, row...
Track Name: A Vague Fight Song (for Sportsball Teams)
Hey, there's a Sportsgame tonight!
Come on, Sportsguys, do your sport right!
Get that Sportsball, reach your goal,
or your opponents', whatever, you know!

Your Sportsfans know what you can do!
Our collective self-worth is wrapped up in you!
So fueled by junk food and cheap beer
we send you our good luck cheer!

Let's go Sportsteam! Fight Fight Fight!
Get that Sportsball! Win the night!
Score more points or... less...
depending on the official rulebook for this game.


Hey there, Sportsmen, don't let us down!
Please don't blow it! Don't make us frown!
Or we'll riot, throw hissy fits,
and then tomorrow we'll all
call in sick!

Go Sports!
Track Name: How Do You Say...?
Track Name: My Pet Monster
Yes please come in, come in!
Thank you for attending
this private viewing of my collection
of oddities and curiosities from all around the world.

Here you will see my gallery
my Addams, Gorey, and Grimly,
but that's for the general public to see
let's travel further down.

Venture down the spiral staircase
where my artifacts are stored.
Yes some are quite illegal
but certain laws must be ignored.
To house such priceless treasures
one cannot afford
to play by the rules that uncultured men adore.

I have voodoo dolls and shrunken heads
reanimated limbs from the living dead
and gore-stained sheets stolen from the beds
of the newly exorcised.

An over here is a queer little piece of history
a shackled box shrouded in mystery.
It seems the only skeleton key
is the blood of men who lie.

And speaking of blood...
please don't mind the floors.
The red-brown spotting, the visceral smell,
and where the wood is scored
as if by someone's fingernails
as they were dragged behind the door.
It seems this evening's true purpose
can no longer be ignored!

My Pet Monster
need something to eat
it's a pity
but you're within reach.
His tummy is rumbly
and Kibble just won't do
when what he's got the munchies for
is you.

As his teeth grind your bones
for his daily bread
I ignore your screams of agony
and soon you'll be dead!

My Pet Monster
can not be restrained.
His hunger cannot
be contained.
The death of the innocent
is my one regret.
He's a monster,
but he's still my pet.
Track Name: Our Entire Relationship Was Shorter Than the Time it Takes to Say the Name of This Song
Hello girl.
So, girl.
Y'know girl?
Whoa, girl!
Yo girl!
No girl.
I've gotta go...

Track Name: Longbottom
Why must I be a perennial dishevelled Neville
and not the heartthrob of his latter-day grace.
I need a remembrall to remember my remembrall.
A Howler at the breakfast table kind of ruins the taste.

10 points from Gryffindor.
100 points from Gryffindor.
1 million points from Gryffindor.
A pure-blood wizard shouldn't be such a waste.

Hey, Neville
why such a Long... bottom?
You'll be a hero when all is said and done.
Just lay low in the Commons Room
or hang out with Professor Sprout
until the 7th book when your time comes.

10 points for Gryffindor.
100 points for Gryffindor.
1 billion points for Gryffindor.
Potter's not the only Chosen One.
Track Name: Sometimes
Sometimes pretty girls have to poop.
And they pretty much always have to pee.
Sometimes pretty girls have to toot,
but they almost never do it around me (and I appreciate it)
they almost never do it around me (thought it's perfectly natural)
they almost never do it around me.
Track Name: Pitch Drop
80 years
8 drips
still nobody has
witnesssed it.
To the livestream
I'm glued
within the next year
the next drip is due!

Pitch Drop!
Pitch Drop!
All eyes are on
the bitumen again.

Professor Parnell
it won the Guinness Record
Ig Nobel Prize as well.
An experiment to show
surprising properties,
the fluidity
and high viscosity!

Pitch Drop!
Pitch Drop!
All eyes are on
the bitumen again.

Pitch Drop!
Pitch Drop!
All eyes are on
the bitumen again!
Track Name: To All My Friends and Followers
Get your poop in a group
'cuz in can pile up quickly,
but if it's contained
it won't smell so bad.
If it's scattered at random
it's like dirty laundry.
So don't spread it out,
keep your crap hampered instead.

Keep your thoughts to yourself
if they're gonna be angry,
especially if they're pointed and vague.
It doesn't take much
to turn my thoughts gloomy.
So watch what you tweet
let's try to get through this day.
Track Name: Q2 (WEM3)
My baby's no mathematician
she's more of a word magician
she knows how to cast a spell on me, oh yeah.
Pouted lips and batted eyes
it should come as no surprise
I'll go along with anything she'll say, oh yeah.

And she's so cute, cute, cute, too too too too
cute, cute, cute, too too too too
cute, cute, cute, too too too too
What the Heaven and Hell am I
supposed to do? (X2)

I find myself in no position
to interrupt her composition
she spins her tale and
I stay out of her way, oh yeah.

And if I had the audacity
to claim some kind of superiority
she'd still get the best of me
she'd win, again.

And she's so cute, cute...
Track Name: Those TGGTB
I came to a realization
and I heaved a longing sigh.
A sad situation
Zod! It makes me wanna cry.
It seems I'll never have enough money
for all the geeky t-shirts I wanna buy.

Said I'll never have enough time
to wear the shirts I wanna own.
'Cuz it would take a Vulcan's lifetime
'cuz my collection would be over-grown.
It would take several regenerations
for the Doctor Who prints alone.

Why did I bookmark you?!
Ript Apparel and wootshirt
why do you do those things that you do? (and you know you do!)
I'm in a bad way, my Droogies
I've got those Think Geek Geeky T-shirt Blues!
Track Name: A Question of Intended Definition
Don't call me cute
that is one word
that I take offense to.
Girls bandy it about
it has so many definitions.

Babies are cute
so is anything too small
to be useful.
It's synonymous with

If I'm inadequate
I don't want to know it.

So if you find me attractive
That's great! But there are so
many other adjectives
that you could use
if you stop and think about it.

Maybe I'm hot
or at least not
too unappealing
maybe you could find it in you
to find me sexy...?

Everybody wants
to be wanted.

Don't call me cute
because I don't know what it means.
Track Name: Re: Your Yard is EVIL (the "tion" song)
Your yard is evil, your lawn's
a lush, green parasite.
Nobody uses them, and to me
that doesn't seem right.
And when you try to
use a lawn you get harrassed.
People get angry and
yell at you "get off the grass".

Verse 1:
I propose without hesitation
that you spurn the Homeowner's Associ-i-a-tion
and lend your lawn to cultivation
to help increase urban vegetation.

Chorus (again)

Verse 2:
With some tears, some blood, and some perspiration
we could decrease this fast food nation
and institute a healthy meal rotation
with our mini Farmville incarnation.

Chorus (#3)

But I've gone on far too long
the day's not getting any cooler
and I have to go mow my lawn.
Track Name: Rain, Parade
They're handing out packets
of saccharin tablets
as they wave their goodbyes.

The clouds roll in
and the rain soon begins
They can't keep the tears
from their eyes.

Cuz they waited for this date.
They still have to wait.
You can't impede the fickle finger
of fate.
Track Name: Periwinkle Sunshine
If I told you that you had beautiful eyes
would you gouge them out with a spoon?
Just to prove me wrong.
Just to push me away.

If I told you that you had kissable lips
would you shave them off in the bath
with your Lady Bic?

You've gotta remember
to be realistic
when you're trying to let me
down easy, baby
Self mutilation
to dissuade attention
is only hurting yourself.

If I mentioned that I liked talking
to you
would you sharpen a q-tip
and puncture both ear drums?

If I whispered that
I want to hold your hand
would you chop both off at the wrists
so I couldn't hold on to you?

You've gotta remember
to be realistic
when you're trying to let me
down easy, baby
Self mutilation
as a passive aggressive act
is only hurting yourself.

If you think that I am
only concerned
with the superficial
you've got so much to learn
about obsession and love
the connection of souls
that takes place somewhere
that's much deeper inside.

If I let slip
that I want to
win your heart
would you cease its
rhythmic beat
so I'd have to
let you go?
Track Name: Browbeat and the Downtrod
Rice is nice, but don't pay full price for mice.
Track Name: Lunch Break - A Love Song
Lunch break
why must you go?
You're here and gone
before I know.
I wish some way
that you could stay
and we could break
for lunch all day.

You're like a little oasis
in the work day flow.
You give me hope for the evening
when the morning is slow.

For a quick nap
a meal or a snack
The Lunch Break is perfect
for any of that! Oh!

Chorus X2
Track Name: Shup...
Okay, you've convinced me
your life is SO much worse than mine.
And yes, you have my sympathy.
You're justified in your contempt
for everyone around you.

You're right, the world is trying
to screw you over
it just goes on and on and on.
I'm amazed that you've kept your composure
and we'll all miss you when you're gone.

Isn't that what you want to hear?

Complaining can be healthy
when it's kept in moderation,
but you've pushed it far
beyond an art form into obsession.
And with each whiny word
you're getting more annoying
than any of those things
that you feel the need to whine about.

I'm astounded at you're lack of patience
and your gross intolerance.
And I'm disgusted with your attitude
towards destiny and fate
and what you think is fair.

There's one thing I can say for you
at least you're consistent.
You re-lose my respect for you each day.
But I know that we should all forgive you
because we know that's just your way.

Isn't that what you believe?!


Clip from Coupling